Question: My boyfriend’s ex won’t go away. In our ten months together, his ex has called and/or texted him daily. I’ve expressed to both of them that it’s a bit much, yet it still continues. His ex has even bad-mouthed me. What do I do?
Answer: His ex only calls and sends texts everyday because he responds and/or initiates the conversations. She is only still around because he lets her and he wants her to be. Your problem is not with the ex, but with your boyfriends. For him to keep up that level of interaction with an ex is not acceptable. You may want to do some analysis of how they ended their relationship and that will give you some insight to why they still talk so much. My bet is that he broke it off with her, but did it in a way that left the door open for some future interaction and giving her false hope that they will one day get back together. That way he can keep her around in case it ever goes bad with you. My suggestion is that you make a decision if you want to deal with this or not. Don’t give him an ultimatum of not talking to her or else because that will simple turn the conversation towards you and your insecurities. Let him know that you need to move on because that is not the type of relationship you want to be involved in and see what his reaction is. At this point he will make the choice to cut it off with his ex or he will be okay with you moving on. Either way it will give you the understanding that you need from the relationship.